I am supremely lucky. Growing up, I never questioned my belief in myself. I knew I could achieve if I focused on something. This has translated in a drive to take opportunities when they presented themselves to me, and allowed me to work in areas that I am in many ways under-qualified for. Whilst the subject matter can be one I am totally unfamiliar with, the self-belief means that I have faith in the skills I have acquired and my ability to adapt them to the challenge at hand.
In many ways, this is a self-lead endeavour. I have had to do the hard yards to up-skill and be prepared to adapt. However, my luck comes from being a part of a family environment which gave me the courage to push forward. My parents supported me when I had big ideas. They believed in me, either to achieve what I wanted, or to figure out on my own that I needed to redirect and reflect. Through each decision, they have offered a safe place to talk through ideas, or a soft place to land if it backfired. The result is that, in more than a decade since I left my parent’s home (apart from one year when I decided to study so moved into the spare room), I have achieved more than I imagined I could and done things I had never contemplated. Through travelling, working and studying, I quite happily carved out my own little part of the world. As I plot the next steps, I have the belief embedded in me. I might be scared at times, but in the end I know it will be just fine.
There is something oddly appealing about homewares. I can spend many an hour wandering through stores, looking at beautiful objects I could fill my home with.
What I do not normally do, is buy these things. I like to think I live sensibly and do not have much more than I need. There are a few items of clothes that hang in my wardrobe, not worn for many years but holding such strong memories. My bookshelf is filled, an accumulation over years of study and enthusiastic reading. There are a pile of platters in my pantry, and plenty of baking gear for numerous occasions. I do enjoy these items, however, and I am happy to have them in my home.
Things are about to change through, and reading another blog the other day inspired me to think a little more about what is coming. The big downsize. Following our wedding, my new husband and I are going to get rid of a large pile of stuff, pack our life back down to the bare necessities, then head off on a bit of an adventure. The idea of the end result excites me, the getting there does not.
It is going to be a tough challenge selling and giving away so many of my possessions. In the end, I think it’s going to be a good move and I will enjoy the results of being mobile for a little longer. My intention is to blog about the process, and maybe what I learn about letting go may just help someone else.
My name is Anna Jensen. It’s a simple statement, and a name I have held for 30 years now. I have defined myself as Anna Jensen, working in several fields under this name. I have published extensively, written a thesis, travelled abroad and created the inevitable life trail that we all do – as Anna Jensen. At the end of this month, I will introduce myself under a new name – Anna Brown.
It is hard to introduce oneself, when in many ways how I define myself is about to evolve. Along with my new name, will be a new husband, new travels and the opportunity for a new career path. My current job is one that pays the bills and is teaching me new skills. It also leaves me unfulfilled and uninspired. Part of delving into my writing again is the opportunity to see where that may take me.
This blog is a journey of exploration for me, and I do hope it is one which may offer me a chance of further engagement with the world. I want to see where I fit as a creative agent. By trial and error, I believe I can find my own niche in the world. I want to write, to create, and to tell stories. It will be in part travel journey later in the year, but more broadly than that it will be my record of a year of transition. I want to be able to look back at the end of this year, and have a way to reflect on all that happens.
Today, my home is in the Kapiti Coast, New Zealand. My name is Anna Jensen, and I am defined by the chaos of evolution.